(no subject)

[pat]

rmjwell asked a very good question on dot_cattiness. Here is my reply.

But it got me thinking.....



Why is cattiness enjoyable? And why don't I find it as amusing as I used to?

There are still contexts in which I find a well-turned snark to be refreshing. My favorite columnist is Miss Manners (Judith Martin), who is no slouch when it comes to withering (and well-deserved) comebacks. And I find Roger Ebert's reviews of bad movies howlingly funny.

But increasingly, I find snarkiness directed at a person -- even a person I don't know -- makes me feel uncomfortable. And a lot of of the snarkiness I read on the 'net (not just confined to dot_cattiness)is aimed at persons, not behaviors. I.e., not "that was a stupid [or pretentious, or FITB] thing to have done" but "you are a stupid [or pretentious or FITB] person for having done it." I find after a while this colors my view of the world -- which tends to be on the jaundiced side, anyway. And all of us have our failings -- all of us are occasionally stupid, or pretentious, or unfair, or mean, or *something*.

But I still occasionally read dot_cattiness. Partly because there are a few contributors who are genuinely gifted wordsmiths, and I stand in awe of their verbal abilities. But that is not all it is. And I don't feel it is good for me -- but I do it anyway. Sort of like worrying a tooth with a cavity in it.



Note: these are expressions only of *my feelings* and are not intended to be a reflection upon anyone else. There are people who I like and respect who contribute to the community, and my respect for them is not diminished thereby.

Comments

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

I actually don't want to read things that are about myself or people I know. I tend to get madder when they are about people I care about than when they are about myself, but neither is fun. That is why a) I've stopped reading on a regular basis and b) in the past when what I would say would be traced back to me -- and hurt someone in the process -- I would vent under an assumed username. (I would never put names or identifying information in a vent, but sometimes you can figure things out just by knowing who's posting.)