(no subject)

[pat]

Interaction with my middle child:

me: "That video game music is seriously annoying."
D: "Yes, yes it is really annoying."

D: "Oh, wait, do you want me to turn the music off?"
me: "Yes, thank you." (I was just about to ask him that, actually.)

One thing D is teaching me is how to ask directly for things, rather than hint. (As I said, I was about to ask him to turn it down.) I was quite pleased, though, that he sensed my discomfort and was able to make the logical step to asking about it. This shows increased social awareness, which is good. I don't want him to try and mind read, but having him be more aware of nuance and social clues will help him down the road.

Comments

[mactavish.livejournal.com]

It might be good both directions. Different people communicate differently, and not everyone would get that "the music is annoying" means "please turn it down." Sometimes in conversations with Joe, we deal with that, as I sometimes say something like, "It's cold out!" and I'm not really complaining, just noticing, and he thinks it means I need the heater on in the car or something, when I don't. We're learning that I try to be a little more direct, as it works best with kids and with Casey, it's just my habit. Joe's learning that I try not to send veiled messages.

[patgreene.livejournal.com]

For me, I think a lot of it was growing up female in the South. We were not *supposed* to ask for things directly. I'm working on it, though.

[tenacious-snail.livejournal.com]

(nod)(nod)(nod)(nod)(nod)(nod)

There are some areas in which I am good at stating my needs. Others where I am not.

Sometimes I try to do the subtle-and-veiled thing (I especially notice this with people with whom I want to not flirt with me or not hit on me), and if they don't pick up on it after several attempts, I sometimes do what feels like whomping them with a sledge hammer.

Bug Yay! for D.